50 Shades of Brown

What really makes you happy? The pursuit of happiness is ingrained into the foundation of America herself.  Happiness looks different for many different people.  I thought I’d ponder out loud one thing that makes people happy, stuff.

 I work with cars 5 days a week.  People come to me to help do routine maintenance on something that for many of them is the second largest investment of their lifetime. This is their baby.  Their freedom. Perhaps it is the essential tool to them for achieving financial success.  Some just love showing off their precious.  (Yeah, you read that in a Golem voice).  Cars are amazing and beautiful but can be utterly stressful and frustrating for people as well.  Regular oil changes, keeping the transmission healthy, and 4 good tires requires a lot of money to keep putting into something that you already spent a pretty penny on.  What do they truly give back to you? I don’t have that answer, and many other people don’t either.  I don’t think cars are the end result of this pursuit.

Something many people love, is clothing. Who doesn’t like a cute new outfit, or longed for a certain jacket until they can finally get it.  I remember my black leather jacket.  I loved that jacket.  I recently gave it to my daughter for a couple reasons.  It looked better on her than me, and it didn’t fit me anymore (too much gained muscle over the years).  People love to get a souvenir t-shirt from somewhere they are visiting, or a ball cap of their favorite sports team, or the shoes that their favorite celebrity happens to be flogging to their fans this week.  But I ask you this, after a few years, where does most of this end up?  Donated to a secondhand store.  Don’t get me wrong, that’s a good choice, but when it was purchased, the perceived joy it brought seemed incredible.  With as fleeting as peoples love for clothing is, I don’t think that clothes truly make people happy either.

Collections.  Whoa.  Ok sir, stop right there.  You can’t say it. This is sacred ground here.  Yes, I’m going to.  And to tell the truth, I’m super guilty of this one as well.  There are collections across the board.  People seem to be obsessed with collections.  I won’t list theirs, but mine might be a little entertaining to some of you.  I’ve done coins and stamps in the past (gave them to my son),  model railroad (again son), Japanese Imperial Navy of WWII, several book series, Lego Space the original first 2 years (only missing one set currently), and others as well.  (No, my fishing equipment is not a collection dear, I use it all, I need it all). Ok, I might own a few collectable antique fishing poles and reels, but that’s merely for my den someday, purely ornamental.  As I think about my own collections, whole days, weeks, even months go by without thought or care toward them. Sure they are interesting to me, but they don’t make me truly happy.

You might see where I’m going with this all. I have truly begun to believe that stuff doesn’t matter. Going on 3 years now, I’ve cut a ton of “stuff” out of my life.  Needless clothing, books I won’t read again, collections gathering dust, etc.  What has it gotten me you ask? Peace.  With less stuff, there is room to relax, enjoy what I do have, and spend time with those I love in a clutter-free environment.  

I was never a hoarder, (I was brought up by a strict German mother, that was NEVER going to happen), but I’ve seen what it can do.  If you haven’t watched the show on Netflix by that title, I do actually recommend it.  What it shows you are people who are DEEPLY unhappy despite literally having it all.  All that massive amount of stuff brought them misery.  It drove those whom they loved away.  Most of these stories seem to have positive endings that involve them having a peaceful home, 95% less stuff, and renewed relationships with people who love and care for them.

How do you find happiness?  I’d suggest one very important beginning for you.  You REALLY don’t need all this stuff.